Author |
Message |
Algren
now we know
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 9:31 pm Posts: 67151
|
Re: Starting at University!
I was a mature student so I did not make friendships initially. But I saw loads that did, and most stopped turning up for lectures and seminars and some failed to graduate. The party lifestyle got on top of them. No friends = no parties = first class degree.
_________________STOP UIGHUR GENOCIDE IN XINJIANG FIGHT FOR TAIWAN INDEPENDENCE FREE TIBET LIBERATE HONG KONG BOYCOTT MADE IN CHINA
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:30 am |
|
|
Shack
Devil's Advocate
Joined: Sun Jul 31, 2005 2:30 am Posts: 38291
|
Re: Starting at University!
Some people have friends and parties and still study a ton, others have no friends or parties and still don't study. If you value studying you'll probably find the time, if you don't there's other ways the time will fly by
_________________Shack’s top 50 tv shows - viewtopic.php?f=8&t=90227
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:35 am |
|
|
Algren
now we know
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 9:31 pm Posts: 67151
|
Re: Starting at University!
Sure, every permutation is possible. I can only speak of what I have experienced.
_________________STOP UIGHUR GENOCIDE IN XINJIANG FIGHT FOR TAIWAN INDEPENDENCE FREE TIBET LIBERATE HONG KONG BOYCOTT MADE IN CHINA
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 1:49 am |
|
|
Dr. Lecter
You must have big rats
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2004 4:28 pm Posts: 92093 Location: Bonn, Germany
|
Re: Starting at University!
Not to forget people who have friends, who actually do not party hard all the time, but go to the movies, go hiking, cook together etc. I do not believe for a seconds that friendships can cost you a degree. You are responsible for your own studying.
_________________The greatest thing on earth is to love and to be loved in return!
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 2:14 am |
|
|
Algren
now we know
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 9:31 pm Posts: 67151
|
Re: Starting at University!
Eh, semantics. I did not suggest that the friends are the issue. But having friends at university does make people less likely to study. There is a real and strong notion that going to university (where you are allowed to decide for yourself whether to turn up for classes or not) is a three-year party. The pressure of this is hard for some to overcome. It's all your own responsibility, sure, but with no friends it's such a lot easier.
_________________STOP UIGHUR GENOCIDE IN XINJIANG FIGHT FOR TAIWAN INDEPENDENCE FREE TIBET LIBERATE HONG KONG BOYCOTT MADE IN CHINA
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 2:25 am |
|
|
Thegun
On autopilot for the summer
Joined: Thu Oct 21, 2004 10:14 pm Posts: 21657 Location: Walking around somewhere
|
Re: Starting at University!
That just sounds depressing. There is definitely a happy medium and your life will turn out fine.
Freshmen year sucks because you basically do high school 2.0 with the mandatory classes. After that you are in your majors and can actually get invested in what you learn.
_________________Chippy wrote: As always, fuck Thegun. Chippy wrote: I want to live vicariously through you, Thegun!
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 8:43 am |
|
|
Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
|
Re: Starting at University!
I don't have any friends from college (in my one year, woo!).
But I did start dating my ex wife in college. Worst mistake I ever made. As it ended up costing me my scholarship due to not focusing on school.
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 10:27 am |
|
|
Dr. Lecter
You must have big rats
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2004 4:28 pm Posts: 92093 Location: Bonn, Germany
|
Re: Starting at University!
See now that is different. Starting a serious relationship in college is, indeed, much riskier, IMO.
_________________The greatest thing on earth is to love and to be loved in return!
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 11:21 am |
|
|
Algren
now we know
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 9:31 pm Posts: 67151
|
Re: Starting at University!
Thegun wrote: That just sounds depressing. There is definitely a happy medium and your life will turn out fine. Maybe it sounds depressing but it was honestly fine. University was probably the best three years of my life. I went there to study because I loved my subject, and study I did. I loved it. Wouldn't change a thing. Obviously I made some friends. Mostly Asian. We thinly keep on contact on Facebook and WeChat.
_________________STOP UIGHUR GENOCIDE IN XINJIANG FIGHT FOR TAIWAN INDEPENDENCE FREE TIBET LIBERATE HONG KONG BOYCOTT MADE IN CHINA
|
Wed Nov 16, 2016 8:44 pm |
|
|
zwackerm
Hold the door!
Joined: Sun Jun 01, 2014 10:26 pm Posts: 20434 Location: Where they shot Knock at the Cabin
|
Re: Starting at University!
So I just found out that one of my best friends is changing his major to something they don't offer here and thus he's transferring after he serves next year as a Residence Assistant.
I was hoping to live with him junior year in an apartment and he was just so kind and genuine and seemed to care about me and everyone else so much. I'm going to miss him so much. Don't think I've ever had someone so close to me move away before. Why couldn't one of my cliquey fake friends who doesn't actually care about me move away? This sucks so much.
|
Mon Apr 24, 2017 3:28 pm |
|
|
Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
|
Re: Starting at University!
Sounds like you like him like him.
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 12:08 pm |
|
|
zwackerm
Hold the door!
Joined: Sun Jun 01, 2014 10:26 pm Posts: 20434 Location: Where they shot Knock at the Cabin
|
Re: Starting at University!
Chippy wrote: Sounds like you like him like him. No. If I was gay, I would hope for way better than him.
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 2:00 pm |
|
|
Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
|
Re: Starting at University!
Sounds like he's not that good of a friend, then.
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 2:33 pm |
|
|
Shack
Devil's Advocate
Joined: Sun Jul 31, 2005 2:30 am Posts: 38291
|
Re: Starting at University!
Don't you have to be gay to know someone's not good enough looking for you to date if you were?
_________________Shack’s top 50 tv shows - viewtopic.php?f=8&t=90227
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 3:15 pm |
|
|
zwackerm
Hold the door!
Joined: Sun Jun 01, 2014 10:26 pm Posts: 20434 Location: Where they shot Knock at the Cabin
|
Re: Starting at University!
Shack wrote: Don't you have to be gay to know someone's not good enough looking for you to date if you were? No.
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 4:04 pm |
|
|
Jack Sparrow
KJ's Leading Idiot
Joined: Thu Dec 31, 2009 8:15 pm Posts: 36923
|
Re: Starting at University!
Shack wrote: Don't you have to be gay to know someone's not good enough looking for you to date if you were?
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 4:17 pm |
|
|
Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
|
Re: Starting at University!
Shack makes a point. You can feel your attraction to someone. If you're gay, could you say for sure whether a woman/man is attractive enough for you to date? Ditto if you're straight.
And if you DO know if someone isn't attractive enough for you to date, wouldn't that mean you're attracted to other members of your same sex, for comparison? Making you bisexual, at the very least.
Also, if this friend is kind, caring, and you're willing to live with him... wouldn't that make up for his lack of attractiveness? As has happened in MANY relationships prior?
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 4:29 pm |
|
|
zwackerm
Hold the door!
Joined: Sun Jun 01, 2014 10:26 pm Posts: 20434 Location: Where they shot Knock at the Cabin
|
Re: Starting at University!
Chippy wrote: Shack makes a point. You can feel your attraction to someone. If you're gay, could you say for sure whether a woman/man is attractive enough for you to date? Ditto if you're straight. I think there are pretty objective beauty standards in society that are easy to see regardless of attraction. Chippy wrote: And if you DO know if someone isn't attractive enough for you to date, wouldn't that mean you're attracted to other members of your same sex, for comparison? Making you bisexual, at the very least. You really can't tell the difference between an attractive and unattractive man? Chippy wrote: Also, if this friend is kind, caring, and you're willing to live with him... wouldn't that make up for his lack of attractiveness? As has happened in MANY relationships prior? I don't know because I have no interest in dating men.
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 5:16 pm |
|
|
Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
|
Re: Starting at University!
Steve Bannon has THREE children. "beauty standards" are objective. If you're not attracted to him, that means you have a standard for male attractiveness. Which means you're attracted to some men.
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 5:43 pm |
|
|
zwackerm
Hold the door!
Joined: Sun Jun 01, 2014 10:26 pm Posts: 20434 Location: Where they shot Knock at the Cabin
|
Re: Starting at University!
Chippy wrote: Steve Bannon has THREE children. "beauty standards" are objective. If you're not attracted to him, that means you have a standard for male attractiveness. Which means you're attracted to some men. If you say so. Still not going to date any dudes.
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 5:49 pm |
|
|
Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
|
Re: Starting at University!
That's for you to decide, and God to judge.
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 5:49 pm |
|
|
Shack
Devil's Advocate
Joined: Sun Jul 31, 2005 2:30 am Posts: 38291
|
Re: Starting at University!
I guess if he's fat or something I can see how zwackerm decided that, though I can't remember the last time I thought "If I was gay, I totally wouldn't fuck that guy"
_________________Shack’s top 50 tv shows - viewtopic.php?f=8&t=90227
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 6:44 pm |
|
|
zwackerm
Hold the door!
Joined: Sun Jun 01, 2014 10:26 pm Posts: 20434 Location: Where they shot Knock at the Cabin
|
Re: Starting at University!
Shack wrote: I guess if he's fat or something I can see how zwackerm decided that, though I can't remember the last time I thought "If I was gay, I totally wouldn't fuck that guy" He's not "fat" but he's a bit pudgy and has a small gut. And he's really hairy. I don't think those are desirable traits.
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 6:51 pm |
|
|
Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
|
Re: Starting at University!
What do you find attractive in a man? Are you so superficial it's only about looks? Because it seems like he has all the other traits you're looking for.
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 6:56 pm |
|
|
zwackerm
Hold the door!
Joined: Sun Jun 01, 2014 10:26 pm Posts: 20434 Location: Where they shot Knock at the Cabin
|
Re: Starting at University!
Chippy wrote: What do you find attractive in a man? Are you so superficial it's only about looks? Because it seems like he has all the other traits you're looking for. I don't want to ever bone a man. Acknowledgement of someone's objective attractiveness is not attraction. I think if I were to be gay I would be non monogamous anyway, so no looks wouldn't matter then.
Last edited by zwackerm on Tue Apr 25, 2017 7:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.
|
Tue Apr 25, 2017 7:03 pm |
|
|