Though it is pointless posting it here, I guess it kinda helps getting it out in any way possible right now. My girlfriend of five years (well, it would have been five next Monday) and I broke up yesterday. And this sucks and hurts.

I hope this didn't have to do with bachelorette party.

Also, that sucks, man. Long relationship breakups suck. Let us know if you need anything!

Is there a French pregnant actress involved?

This really sucks. Why did you break up? Did you see it coming?

Cherish the memories of your England trip and, welcome to Brazzers.com

Propose.

Don't do this.

Yeah, don't do that. Instead, go around to her house, write "BITCH" in weedkiller on her lawn, get naked, and a do a dance. And if she has a pet, you should probably kill it. If she doesn't know it's over, she will then!

She has no lawn or a pet.

Also, I won't propose. Jesus, what kind of an idea is that?

No, it is not connected at all to the bachelorette party.

Speaking of Brazzers.com, up until recently, I had no idea what it is. Then my Filmfutter colleague decided to fuck around with me for fun and programmed the website so that each time I tried to go to Filmfutter with my regular IP, I'd be redirected to Brazzers.Anyway...

This time, frankly, no I did not see it coming. Well, I did maybe 10 hours before it happened, but I don't think that counts. When your partner says "we need to talk later" you don't need to be Nostradamus to see it coming.

Dude that does suck. Sorry man & good luck with the next one

Well, as for right now, I am still in denial that it will remain finished...

You'll be fine in a month, DL

Well 5 years is a long time and she may have been tired of waiting.

Are you going to tell us why it happened or not? We're on the edge of our proverbial seats!

Sorry to hear about this DL. Just try to keep as busy as you can right now to try to stay distracted though it may be tough. We'll be hoping for the best for you.

Yes, just keep busy. TRY AND REACH 100k POSTS!

Seriously, though, you broke up with a girl. You didn't get diagnosed with cancer on the day your parents died and your brother got arrested for kiddie-fiddling. "We'll be hoping for the best for you" ...

Learning to get over girls is part of life. You'll be stronger for it. Maybe you should have taken her to Barbados, not Bath.

Sucks, sorry to hear that.

It's odd how after you're supposedly growing closer to each other there's a breaking point somewhere.

She broke up with me.

As for the reason, well, as it often is, it is complicated. The essence is that apparently I wasn't opening up myself enough so that she distanced herself from me over time and lost feelings for me.

But she suggested we stay friends. Which is known as the worst suggestion in the history of mankind in situations like this.

Follow her advice:

Yeah, you see, when you say "no" to the use of a butt plug in the bedroom, girls remember that shit!







Ouch. That might be one of the cruelest things a girl can say.

Stay strong, brother!

My ex-wife told me something similar when we split. Haven't seen or talked to her since. For the better.

For some reason this seems to be a thing people like to say to just not make the break-up so harsh. It hardly ever works out that one stays friends but I guess that's not the point. It's just about being polite in that "you're not that terrible" and if you ever run into them again it's likely to be on small talk terms at least.


This seems pretty significant actually, did you have something planned? I imagine she might have expected that anniversary would have been nice in a way and she wanted to be sure to jump the gun before that.



It sounds sensible in one way, but on the other hand that doesn't sounds like something that just happens. Why now? Is a question I would pretty much have.

I'm talking from very little experience, but don't people only really break-up because there's another person in play?

No, they don't. Sometimes people just break up.

I had nothjing extravagant planned, we'd probably have gone to some fancy restaurant and that's it. We tend to keep the anniversaries low key. Not sure that has played into her decision.

Why now? Well, I can't answer that either. It certainly must have been something that has been building up for a while, but still it wasn't a pre-planned thing and we had a smaller argument (we rarely argue in general), which quickly evolved into the whole break-up thing. Usually I am able to sense things like these well in advance, but this time there was no "warning signs".

It sounds like you had hit a rut and she didn't know how to get out of it. Did you see a future with her in it? Or were you just planning on homeostasis?

No warning signs? Maybe she was planning a surprise party for your fifth anniversary. But don't hold out hopes.

To be real, what you think is over is probably over. If you don't feel this is over but she feels otherwise, you should ask her directly for an answer to put a closure on this thing.