Everyone knows what im talking about here.

You: Hey lovely new Sony laptop, why are you making that ugly whirring sound.
Laptop: WHIRRRRRRRR. AND BLACKOUT.
You: Wait, you just blacked out! That's not right! Hold on lemme phone Sony about this.

85 Minutes later

Obnoxious English Lady: Sony would like to let you know you are a valuable customer to us, thank you for holding.

4 days later

Them: Uh, hai, my name is Emmit. U r thru to a call center based in your country of ORIGIN as part of the SONY dedication to high quality cunsumer satisfiactions survice.

Can a take ur name pwease?

586 minutes later

Them : So you are telling me that ur system is like, not coming on? The sound has 2 be cumin from ur fan rite?

You: Can i speak with your manager please.

Them: Yeh. Im puttin u on hold.

85 sold hours of Vivaldi later

Them: Hello my name is sarah. U r thru to a call center based in your country of ORIGIN as part of the SONY dedication to high quality cunsumer satisfiactions survice.

You: Are you the manager?

Them: Oh. No, why, do you wish to speak 2 my supervizorrr?

You: Actually, do you guys have a call center in India or South Africa? I'd like to give that a bash round about now.

Them: Of course. You should be advised that connecting with our overseas callcenters costs the same as calling us though.

You: WTF?! I THOUGHT THIS WAS A FREEPHONE NUMBER?!

Them: Sir, I'm afraid i don't like ur tone with me and as part of sony's protection service for its employees I have no option but 2 cut you off 4 abuse. BAI

Your Mom: Hey, i was dusting your room and the laptop cable was loose at the wall. I plugged it in and it came on.

You: Can I have one ticket to Mean Girls please?

Sarah: Sure, $14.50

You: I have a student card, sorry.

Sarah: Mmmm. I can't read minds.

You: No shit, you must be blind too.

Customer reading newspaper

Me: Hi, would you like to buy the newspaper

Customer: Nah thanks. I just want to read whats on tv tonight, i'm not gonna pay a dollar for that.

Me: o ok. i just didn't think this was a library.

Customer leaves, and comes back

Customer: Woolworths is a huge company, I'm pretty sure they candle handle this. No wonder everyone goes to the competition, Woolworths is on a downward spiral these days.

Customer leaves, and comes back

Customer: Can I speak to your supervisor?

Me (with a smile on my face): I am the supervisor.

Hahaha!!!

PWNED

what's even more funny is that i didn't have my name badge on either so he probably couldn't get my name or anything. but u know fuck him, him reading the newspaper makes it turn into a 2nd hand good. the same goes with magazines.

i use to. but it's not the same as a UK Woolworths.

getluv is the people I hate.

It's a fucking newspaper. Get over it.

i know it is. but i don't like used goods when i buy it. when i buy something i want it new and fresh, the way you would like it.

i have worked in customer service since i was 14. staff aren't paid well and honestly the put up with a lot of shit from both ends.

i work at a better and much classier retail company now, and my service is always exceptional.

I have to agree on the paper. Other people touching it, messing it up and then putting it back. A newspaper costs at most 1.00 unless it's a foreign one. Just buy the thing instead of fidgeting around with it. Magazines otoh I'd browse through all day long and I only buy if I really really really like it.

Yes, I love my items fresh and new... if those items are anything but a newspaper.

when you go to the supermarket, you buy what you need and leave. you don't stop to check the race guide. tbh, i just wanted to mess around with him. i use to do that.

Okay, so here's mine:


March 14th: My girlfriend's old ISP contract is running out and since I hate that ISP, I seek out a new one. My girlfriend and I make a contract with a new telephone and internet services provider.

They say: By the time the old contract runs out, you'll have telephone and internet through us.

Us: "Aweome!"

March 16th: We get a letter that our case is being worked on.

April 10th: The old ISP contract runs out, we've got no telephone, no internet. Calling the new ISP: "What's the deal?"

They say: "Don't worry, very soon.."

April 16th: We get the very same fucking letter as a month ago saying that they started working on our case and we'll have internet and telephone in SIX weeks.

I call them: "WTF, mate?"

They say: "We've got technical issues call later plz!"

April 20th: I call them: "WTF, mate?"

They say: "We've got technical issues, no idea who you are, you'r enot even in the system.

Me: "What? You stoopeed?"

They say: "No idea what's going on...call later"

April 25th: (over two weeks no internet or telephone at home): I call them: "So...?" They say: "No idea why you don't have it...oh and you#re in the system, don't worry. It's being worked on".


April 28th: I call them: "Aaaaand?"

They say: "Who r u?! Not in ze system, man. G'bye"

April 29th: I call them: "Are you nuts?"

They say: "We've got technical issues...call later plz"


May 2nd: I call them: "If you don't get me internet, I'll hunt you down"

They say: "We're very sorry, appears that many clients' data was deleted...sorry. Sorry. Oh yes, sorry. We work on it, no idea whe you'll get it though. Sorry. BTW: sorry."


May 10th: I call them: "So, hm?"

They say: "End of May, maybe...or beginning of une.."

I say: "well, as long as it's not in August"

They say: "Uhhh, we don't know. Hopefully not."

I say: "Hopefully?!?!?!?!?!!?"


May 28th: 10 weeks after the signing of the contract we get the internet...

This happened a few years ago and I swear its a true story.

Me: Place a Red Bull on the counter and ask for $20 on pump 5

Cashier: May I see your I.D.

Me: What for?

Cashier: for the Red Bull

Me: Why? its a Red Bull

Cashier: You have to be 18 to buy Red Bull

Me: Ummm, No you don't

Cashier: Yes Sir you do

Me: Why? it contains no alcohol or tobacco its an Energy Drink

Cashier: Store Policy sir

Me: Where's the sign stating such policy? I see a we card because we care sign for alcohol and tobacco, but no mention of Red Bull anywhere

Cashier: I need to see an I.D. for the Red Bull

Me: I don't need to show you I.D. because I'm not buying alcohol or tobacco. I'm buying a Red Bull which anyone can buy without I.D.

Cashier: Sir, it contains alcohol so we have to ask for I.D.

Me: Really? can you show me where it says alcohol on the can? why don't you keep it with the beer instead of with the sodas?

Cashier: The store manager stocks the store and it the alcohol is listed as guarana, Its a code word for the kids.

Me: Wow!? i did not know that guarana is another name for alcohol. I've never gotten drunk off Red Bull before? Maybe I'm not drinking it right?

Cashier: no need to get rude Sir, I need to an I.D.

Me: Here's $25, ring me up for the Red Bull and then I want the change on pump #5

Guy behind me laughing his ass off: Lady its a Red Bull, an energy drink not beer.

Cashier: Sir no need to get involved

Guy behind me laughing his ass off now becoming pissed off: Your stupidity is making me wait longer than I should. He's buying a Red Bull and gas, not a six pack and smokes.

Me: Smirking, Red Bull and the change on #5

Cashier finally relents after nearly 5 more minutes of wasted haggling and angry chimes from the long line that has now formed. Says she's going to check with her manager tomorrow.

Me: Yeah, good luck with that. He's going to laugh at you. Then I walk out the door.

As I'm pumping my gas the guy who was behind me walks up and we start talking about what a frigging dumbass the clerk was. What should've taken 30 seconds lasted nearly 10 minutes and she ended up with a line of about 15-20 pissed off people. I don't mind showing I.D. if I'm buying beer, smokes, or using my credit card. But I'm drawing the line at energy drinks.

Ok, that's a classic

Guarana = alcohol code word?

Seriously, though, there are really lots lots of people who actually do think that Red Bull contains alcohol! Not even only absolutely stupid people...

I believe that, one of the gas stations here was doing that and pissing a lot of people off. Everyone started going to the other gas station across the street.

That's the point though. The energy drink manufacturers purposely use branding that is similar to that of alcohol to increase the "coolness" factor with the young crowd.

It's working.

Working customer service at Wal-Mart, I get very tired of getting yelled at by ladies who just stole clothes from the store and try to return it without a receipt.

One large one with a crying baby in particular had poked a hole in the bra and insisted on returning it after she had just "bought" it yesterday. An associate I work with had seen her doing the same thing, so I denied the return and told her we have to have a receipt. She then started the whole "f you guys, I'm suing Wal-mart, give me the manager" speech.

The manager was able to pull up an item history on the bra and found out that that type of bra hadn't been sold in our store in over a week. The lady's crazy eyes suddenly went a little to fear and she tried to make up some excuses before leaving, saying she must have got it at a different Wal-Mart (even though the nearest one is 30 minutes away).

These kind of people drive me insane!!!

I support the death penalty for these people. Truly the cows of humanity, grazing in the pastures of low-low pricing.

Oddest one I ever got was when I was a teenager, I was at the bank and I was depositing money and the women demand to see an i.d. which wasn't with me. I told her I didnt have it and aksed why I need and she said it was the law. I was like "lady Im obviously not gonna deposit my own money into someone else account" and even if I did theres nothing illegal about it. We go on for a bout 2-3 minutes of me saying "Im depositing money into my account" but she said she couldnt do it without an i.d. so I her manager is behind her and I say "excuse me, do I need an i.d. to deposit money into an account as long as I have the #?" and he says "No, of course not" and I just look at the women and

Last weekend I went out to dinner at Ruby Tuesday (meh) with a girlfriend who wanted to go there because of the salad bar.

Our waiter not only knocked over BOTH of our water glasses (not even together, at two separate points!) but also brought both of us the wrong entrees, didn't apologize for it, AND THEN tried to blame us for "not making it clear" what we wanted to eat.

Needless to say, I will not be going to Ruby Tuesday anytime soon. I mean, not that I was a big fan before or anything.

My story, happened about a month ago while padraig was visiting.

We were about 8 people and starving. This restaurant came highly recommended but on the way there, one of the cars developed a problem. While we got seated, we decided that someone will order for me and this other dude while the 2 of us would go find a garage to drop the car at. It was critical to do it that day as the battery oil thing had cracked and the longer we wait, the more break power he loses.

We looked around and finally found a place willing to take the car in for the day. It had been 30 minutes since we'd left and when we finally came back, it had been about 40. We noticed that people were on their entrees and that the waitress had said that the food will be out momentarily.

Well, a good 25 minutes later, there was still no food and i was slightly ticked. we asked the waitress again whats going on and she said the food should be out any moment. 5 minutes later and no food and this one guy on the table (one of the few who could speak french) told the waitress this is ridiculous. She made some excuse about the 2 of us having gone so they waited for us to come back before cooking. Sadly, the talk happened in french and she walked away before the story was told to us.

I personally never have a big issue with people knocking over drinks or being late, as long as they apologize for what happened and maybe .. just maybe talk about refunds or free drinks. I just like it when people acknowledge they made a boo boo. however, what i do hate is when waitresses and waiters put the blame on me for something that was really their fault.

At this time, just when me and this other guy were about to get up and call for the manager, 2 meals came out and we thought ... fine .. at least the food is here. 2 minutes later, another plate arrived. another 3 minutes later, another plate. It seemed like they were giving us whatever they got.

At this point, we'd been sitting at the restaurant for almost 80 minutes i think. I asked everyone to stop eating and me and the other dude who could speak french walked up to the waitress and asked for the manager. Turned out it was she.

We started out kindly being nice and telling her what the situation was and she asked us how many entrees we had to start with. When she realized there were only 3, 1 soup and 2 salads, she first made a couple of excuses. Then she brought up the whole going away thing and i cut in and told her that if that excuse was even remotely true, then why would the waitress come and say the food was just about to come out?

its at this moment that she pretty much did something that i couldn't stand for. I asked her a question and she turned to my friend and answered the question in french .. because he was being less aggressive than me. I cut her again and told her that people who came in after us have already been served and a couple actually leaving. once again, she tried to put the blame on us (she still hasn't apologized once) and in the middle of me saying something, she walked away to serve someone came back and continued the conversation. I told her that i've eaten all over the world and i haven't come across any steak .. that takes 80 minutes to cook. No Steak. She said shes been in the restaurant business far longer than me so i told her that i've probably been dining at more restaurants for a period far longer than her. When she started talking to my friend again in French, i had no choice but to play the race card. We were the only brown people in that whole restaurant full of white people, everyone of them being served even when we're arguing. I hate the whole race thing but this time, i genuinely believed it to be true.

I told her that i'm not paying for my meals. just as i said that, the last plate came out for us and shes like "well your food is all here now. Why the refund". I reminded her how 4 of us have had our plate in front of us for 15 minutes now and not eating because we were put under the impression that everyone's plate is coming out soon. Our food is cold and we want a complete refund on it. We'll pay for the drinks.

After some arguing, she walked away again and we told everyone to just get up and walk out. For literally half a minute, all conversation at the place died. She finally had no choice to give us the refund and told us she lost 400 dollars on us. I told her i couldn't really give a shit anymore and if she decides to walk away one more time, she can say goodbye to the 70 dollars worth of drinks as well cause i'll be leaving too.

Bill came, we paid and walked out. 400 dollars worth of food just sat there on the table.

i use to put up with a lot of similar shit at the supermarket i use to work at. but the duty manager usually gave them the refund anyway because the theory is people will spend an average of $100 a week at a supermarket, and majority of it will be at the store they stole a 3 dollar item from.

but i was like fuck that, what about the principle.